People often go on a date and spend a lot of time in their own mind or get nervous and talk too much. Avoid daydreaming or critiquing the other person in your mind, and try not talking endlessly about yourself. Listen to the other person, ask them questions and you are more likely to put them at ease and learn more about them. This will allow you to respond thoughtfully, helping the conversation to move along nicely. Once you understand them, there will be a natural inkling for them to want to understand you. The aim is to seek first to understand before being understood. (John)